firelight's last bleeding lines of goodbye..

i felt again this sudden rush of emptiness.
i'm like a fugitive..
trying to escape from the harmful realities of life..
a decimated heart.
melancholy.
there is no reciprocity anymore.
when fate collides..
when paths cross..
there will be a chance that love is then created.
will it be for eternity?
the answer is undoubtedly yes..
well..no.
wake up from your fucking dreams.
there is no such thing as forever.
there is always an ending.
agony.
the great feeling of anxiety..
mourning without a death.
the feeling of being left out.
a betrayal.
soliloquizing.
an everyday habit.
then realize the abrading truth.
time will never turn back.
general abstinence.
the last piece of thread you're holding into..
it's gone..
all gone..
there is only memories.
and now, the existence of frailty is visible.
very visible and alive.
chasing the past.
the impossible goal yet it is dreamed by most of the people.
unfortunately,
there are no such thing as time machines..
you do get hurt.
you do get wounds.
but it is essential.
mistakes happen.
yet lessons are learned.
pain.
firelight. firelight.
it's not mending.
starting all over again is crap.
but you will find yourself asking for it over and over again.
it is addictive.
there is no escape.
unless you let go. for real.
it has grown on me.
but i have to stop.
it's causing me too much pain.
it's true.
being tired is never a reason.
you just don't feel the same way anymore.
or
you never felt it in the first place.
lethargy.
the last bleeding lines of goodbye..